Press the "Curse!" button to be randomly insulted in Elizabethan (Shakespearian) language. There are 388944 possible curses.
These are not actually found in any of William Shakespeare's plays, but they are of the language he used.
The source code to the curse generator is public domain. Use the perl or PHP versions as you wish. This is typically the first program I write in a language, and you can see several versions on my GitHub page.
Clay Sides (email@example.com) took the liberty of converting this page to the palmtop platform. You can download the Palm version here. I know nothing about palmtops, so can't provide any assistance. Please direct such queries to Mr. Sides.
If you found this site from somewhere other than another web page, I'd like to hear about it.